A PWI didn't prepare for me Corporate America like I thought it would. Continued...
...Back to my first job, I was hired to replace the admin that was retiring. I was just happy to be employed after a year of trying out the stock market life, and it was not for me. I should have known I was in for the bullshit because on the first interview I went with my hair curly. The recruiter said oh they loved you however they just told me to tell you the next time you come in make sure your hair is combed. I got the job but, when I tell you they gave me every damn task under the sun. I worked late every single day and sure enough my first write-up came about a year in. They said I was too distracted, and I said I support 40 people with no help, what do you mean I am distracted? I went to HR and the write-up came off my record. I was up for a promotion soon after that but somehow they "forgot" and lost my paperwork as my manager retired. A new coworker was hired, and was trained to get the certificates I already had as they said to me he's a guy so he gets it more. I should "stay in a woman's place" I even had white female coworkers tell me I was making it hard for myself and I needed to be more like them.
After 2 years of work and write-ups, I was transferred to another department. When I tell you I worked for the most racist band of idiots that the company had to offer. I spent the next 6 years being ridiculed. They would literally sit around and make fun of my college degree and my blackness. If I was one minute late or early for lunch I was written up for not following rules. If I came in early, I was written up. If I stayed late I was written up. Also they hired new accountants who would constantly make mistakes so it was my job to clean up all their accounting work. I got physically ill from dealing with them. Weekly, I was having panic attacks and finally I had a asthma attack I couldn't stop. I called my doctor trying to get a lunch appointment so as not to miss work and he told me to go to the emergency room. I was hospitalized for 2 weeks for having low-grade pneumonia and what did I come back to? You guessed it another write-up for not finishing my work before I left for "vacation." HR was no help. They would tell me I was making the situation more difficult by complaining.
The other people that worked at the company weren't much better. I was sexually harassed constantly. There was a guy in the mailroom that literally hide around the office and take pictures of my ass as I walked by. One day on happenstance I caught him when he forgot to switch his phone to silent, this fool was crouched down in a broom closet with a camera. The people in the mailroom wore uniforms, and the highest concentration of black people. Whenever I went to the mailroom for anything, I was often mistaken for a mailroom employee by white women and was asked to get them soft-drinks or copies or anything else. Whenever I was at the copy machine in my work wears, someone would come and ask me why their copy job was taking so long. The manager of the mailroom even spread a rumor we were sleeping together so he could get clout among the Black people. I just tried to keep my head down and get through the day. I knew every person of color in the office because there were so few of us, we would have small words in the hallway like it has to better than this, take it day by day, and a few smiles and head nods but that was all the community I could muster. My famous saying everyday "I'm just here because they pay me" and literally that's the only reason I still showed up because why else would I deal with that.
My last 6 months there were the worst. My male coworker got drunk and left his work laptop in a cab and was told boys will be boys. I was written up for paperclipping a document instead of stapling it. I brought up a plan for the next quarter and was laughed at, when my coworker mansplained it, he was lauded. I finally had had enough and said he just repeated what I said and you act like you can't hear me! My boss says in the meeting "did I have to be such a black bitch about it with all that attitude". I walk out and speed dial HR... they tell me I misheard him and has actually making the environment more hostile. My bosses boss calls me into his office after I hang up the phone. He wants to talk to me about my future and basically says my days are numbered. He says have you thought about a career in retail. I think you would be great at folding, since you are so organized. He then tells me I am taking a job away from a qualified white person and I should be happy they hired me and I should act more grateful. At that point it just gave my coworkers free license to act a fool to me.
Some of racist things I heard were: I looked ethnic when I didn't straighten my hair, I didn't act Black except when angry, Trayvon Martin deserved to die because he was a gangbanger (This was the coworker who actually liked me), did I carry knives because I thought all black people carry knives, was it hard for me to learn to learn to read coming from the ghetto. Of course I would get upset, I would I was told time and time again I was over reacting to their comments. My last day, I took a mental health day because I just couldn't take it and you guessed it, I was told to come in and I was fired on my day off... on MLK day to be exact.
The many micro aggressions: I voted for Obama so how could I be racist, I bought you a book about Lincoln freeing the slaves for Christmas, isn't affirmative action great, aren't you glad you were the minority hire, aren't your people supposed to be hard workers, being written up for actually using my vacation days, and told the good employees don't use any days. How were they able to get away with so much during my 8.5 years employed there? It's simple; they were just following company policy. The policies were designed to be racist. And sure there were a few minorities who managed to get an office, a decent title, a worthwhile pay check but they weren't treated any better. As it was just a good ole boys club and how dare a smart black women try to stick her nose in the business. I should have just been a cute, dressed well, do all their work, never raise a fit, and maybe just maybe they would eventually see my worth.
Stay Tuned for Part 3...
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