Krysty Del

My family is expanding!  But not in the way you might think. It's a boy and he has my whole face.  💙  He's super sweet and quite handsome if I do say so myself. No, no, I'm still single. No, no, I didn't touch anyone. No, no, I'm not currently pregnant.  No, no, I didn't leave Chicago because I was pregnant.  We have talked about this... I am allergic to children well, at least my uterus is. LOL Someone was pregnant long ago and now I have a whole brother. He's not a baby at all. In fact, he's 48.  He's about 10 years older than me and we look just alike. Or at least I think so. I have talked about this a few times, how I grew up without much family. How I didn't know my parents really. How I always felt like I had family out there. It was like this soul longing, like part of me was missing. Through ancestry, over the last 10 years or so, I found 3 of them. There might be more... I mean only God knows.  He lives in Orlando, Florida. He grew up i...

We are taking a break from Part 3 of my last blog to talk about narcissists and sociopaths and how to recognize one. I wrote a letter to Derrick Jaxn's wife and I hope it find you in good company. Dear Mrs. Jaxn. I have been where you are, and I hope you read this and make it out safely. Narcissists feed on your insecurities to make you dependent on them. They sometimes use religion and standard societal practices to make you feel crazy for not falling in line. I was there and I got out and I hope you do too. My story starts in 2016. I started dating a man, a man heavily involved with the church. A little back story, I was not in a good place when I met him.  I had just lost what I thought was my dream job, and I was depressed and sad. We were old friends, and he asked me out to lunch after seeing on social media that I was out of work. He was just to apt to listen to all I was going through, I thought he was sent from God.  We started talking, and all he wanted to do was le...

 A PWI didn't prepare for me Corporate America like I thought it would. Continued... ...Back to my first job, I was hired to replace the admin that was retiring. I was just happy to be employed after a year of trying out the stock market life, and it was not for me. I should have known I was in for the bullshit because on the first interview I went with my hair curly. The recruiter said oh they loved you however they just told me to tell you the next time you come in make sure your hair is combed. I got the job but, when I tell you they gave me every damn task under the sun. I worked late every single day and sure enough my first write-up came about a year in. They said I was too distracted, and I said I support 40 people with no help, what do you mean I am distracted? I went to HR and the write-up came off my record. I was up for a promotion soon after that but somehow they "forgot" and lost my paperwork as my manager retired. A new coworker was hired, and was trained to...

A PWI didn't prepare for me Corporate America like I thought it would. I was a bit wide-eyed, trusting, and had a lack of parental guidance. I was taught you that if work hard and you keep your head down, the world would see your worth and in turn reward you. Let me tell you I am a ridiculously hard worker and I have had set-back, after set-back, after set-back, after set-back.  I'm the type of person if I don't know something, I will learn everything in my disposal on the subject. See: makeup, styling, photography, analytics, Microsoft Office, and most recently TikTok. I watch experts, ask for study sessions with peers, reach out to people that know more than I and offer to pay for lunch or an hour. I will make a way in whatever it is I am trying to do. I attended a multitude of blogging workshops over the years before I just started writing here. This isn't a Langston Hughes Poem, I mean life for me ain't been no crystal stair despite the name (Get it, my name is ...

I am a fraud because I act like everything okay and it isn't.  Sometimes I was down during this pandemic and that's when my darkest inner voice was the loudest. It was in those times that I struggled to realize that I was just down for a moment but not completely out. I think I am a fraud somedays because how can I portray this happy individual on the internet when I am not always happy. Don't get me wrong there were good days mixed in with bad days but there were a lot of bad days to get here. In order to find what I thought was the goodness, I attempted to cope in unhealthy ways.  I have tried the following: At first I drank it away. When I ran out of drinks I knew how to make, I made the ones I saw on tv. Eventually, I bored myself with alcohol.  I attempted to sex it away, but when you don't feel anything for the individual, the sex isn't enjoyable. All I did was feel more nothingness. I played with my hair. I had braids, cornrows, locs, twists, wigs, straight h...

Break-ups are tough.  I just recently went through the hardest break-up of my life and I am still recovering. I mean I just didn't see it coming, if I did I would have better prepared myself. It's been a year and I am just still not okay. I just look in the mirror and I don't look or feel the same. It's why I have been trying so many new things. Trying to capture a look/feel of my old self. It was all so unexpected. I just don't get how they could just move on without even checking on me, without so much as a goodbye.  Some days, I just look in the mirror some days and cry. I loved her. I really loved her. I loved the way she touched me. The way I would feel after she touched me. I wouldn't even have to tell her what I wanted or needed, she just knew. We met randomly one sunny day. I was walking down my street, this was about 10 years ago. I saw her. She had purple hair at the time, one side was shaved. She was loud and outspoken. She was Puertorriquena and let ...

I have always had an eye for quality fashion.  In another life, I have a store of my random finds.  You can let me go in a thrift store or TJ Maxx/Marshalls/Home Goods/Ross and I will find the diamond in the rough every time. My earliest memory of this eye was the time me and my mom went to the Black Expo. I had to be no older than 8 or 9.  This guy was trying to get my mom's number so he said I could have any one thing in his booth of T-shirt’s, and hats. He said she couldn’t help me, and my mom responds "OH! She doesn’t need help". The guy was thinking I would pick a $5 item and he would score the number. I walked around for about 5 minutes. And way in a corner, I spotted a hat. My little self, pointed and said "I want that one... that black and brown one". He was like you sure you don’t want this colorful one... I’m like no that looks cheap, I want the one I picked. He takes it down and it’s a $50 suede baseball cap.... lol. Under his breath he murmurs "...

Happy International Women's Day. I need a do over. I shared this Spring fashion post, so happy about the warmer temps and I missed something important. This is women's month but also today is International Women's Day. A day when we should applaud how far we have gotten and all of our accomplishments.  With celebrating our accomplishments, we must talk about all we women have been through. This journey for all of us has not been an easy one. Last night, I was glued to the tv watching the Meghan and Harry/Oprah Interview. Although, I have never been a princess/duchess I can relate to how she felt at every turn.  I stand with cousin Meghan.  I shared a bunch of inspirational quotes this morning on my Instagram page: There is no limit to what we as women can accomplish. - Michelle Obama A girl should be two things: who and what she wants. - Coco Chanel For most of history, anonymous was a woman. - Virginia Wolf A woman does not have to be modest to be respected. Strong women...

I am trying to build a community where we not only share fashion looks and opinions, I mean cause I love a good look, but also share our emotional growth. It's hard to take a good look at ourselves and admit where we have messed up, take accountability for our own mistakes, and try to grow. I hope that with each of my blogs you not only learn something about me, but also yourself. I have abandonment issues. I say this all the time but only recently have I come to terms with what that means and how I can work to fix them. I recently read an article that referenced the causes for abandonment issues and how to come to terms.  Article can be found here:    https://www.xonecole.com/how-to-overcome-abandonment-issues/ The article states: "T hat our souls come on this earth carrying at least one of the five wounds. Depending on which they suffer from, the right lives will be assigned to them. By the right lives, I mean human experiences that will expose our souls to situations ...

A response to the Huffington Post article... "I'm exhausted from trying to be the 'Right' Kind of Black girl at work." I read a Huffington Post article entitled "I'm exhausted from trying to be the 'Right' Kind of Black girl at work.  https://www.huffpost.com/entry/codeswitching-while-black-at-work_n_5aa2b7dce4b07047bec60c5c?utm_campaign=hp_fb_pages&utm_medium=facebook&ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000047&utm_source=bv_fb&fbclid=IwAR3BydHScexIUNT18_ONZc68Numem3wWZBp3BrqIt-7QgFcAYu6tVm9MxUU And it spoke volumes. When I tell you this girl and I have lived parallel lives. I realized I might never be the right kind of black girl. I went to all black schools until high school. I had my first exposure to kinds of different races, the summer between 6th and 7th grade, at summer camp. I wore my hair in a big afro with my baby doll dresses and platform sandals  and I was met with stares. I was young and I didn't much care what kids thought of me....